Daddy Diaries

What will our boy will look like? Will he know my voice? Will I know him? Will I be able to pick him out of a crowd of other babies? What will it be like to bring him home? What will it be like to have a little baby in the apartment? Will I love him? Will I be a good daddy? Will I raise him with honor and strength while still passing onto him a love for God and the beauty that He placed all around us?

I find myself tearing up… and no, it’s not just something in my eye. I am scared to death that I don’t have what it takes to be a good daddy. My own dad had to fight between hanging with us boys and working and work won out due to necessity. I didn’t want that for my children, but now it seems that, by nearsighted choices I have made in my life, that I have condemned my children to the same fate that my father and I had while I was growing up… I hate thinking about that future. I want more for my child than what I chose for myself.

The question is where do I go from here?